Avoid These 4 Statements in Arguments

Don’t make it personal

Photo by Mateusz D on Unsplash

Avoid These 4 Statements in Arguments

To reduce escalation!

Has someone said or done something that has angered you to a point of no return?

Feel tension mounting?

Blood pressure rising?

Fists clenching?

While there has been a great deal of advice about what to do in stressful or confrontational situations, there has been less about what not to do.

4 PHRASES TO AVOID IF YOU ARE ON THE BRINK OF A MAJOR CONFLICT

• You never listen to me, or you are not listening to me.
• This situation is all because of you, it is all your fault.
• YOU always do this or say this or behave this way.
• I seriously can’t believe you are saying or doing this again.

This is argumentative language.

Paraphrase

Try instead to paraphrase what you have heard the other person saying.

Paraphrasing helps the other person to feel validated, listened to and understood. Put what they have said into your own words and then de-escalate the situation by adding your own take on what they have said.