Janice Tovey
2 min readNov 12, 2021

The New Non-Negotiables

The old criteria for choosing a partner is exactly that! Old, out dated, areva durche, sayonara, adios, good bye!

The indicators of looks, possessions and finances, while important, don’t necessarily ensure a healthy, happy, long term relationship.

When searching for a soul mate, the time has come to be asking different questions.

Instead of is he/she good looking, we could be asking if he/she is attractive on the inside?

Yes he/she can manage their own company, but can he/she handle their own feelings?

Can he/she show empathy, display authentic feelings, and genuinely love him/herself?

Of course, it totally depends on what you are looking for in a partner. We are all different, and what is important to one person may not be of value to another. And true, we are absolutely not all searching for a long term relationship.

However, if an individual is considering another person for the long run, the time may have come to dig a little deeper.

Consider the following:

Does the person bring out the best in you?

Is the person flexible? Can they handle shades of grey and ambivalence?



Janice Tovey

My passion is writing. I also love reading, teaching, animals, nature, music, and humor. I am curious about everything and enjoy writing about all things.